Monday, September 10, 2012

Signs of the Rosh HaShanna apocalypse

Attention trend watchers. Here's the newest must-have holiday item for the self-consciously frum


Say good-bye to fish heads! Why would anyone attempt to win God's favor with something like that, when a far more disgusting option such as this can be purchased by the box? We predict that within 10 years only poor people and Modern Orthodox Jews will still be using fish. And after the Modern Orthodox catch up and switch to lamb, we predict the Haredim will go back to fish.

Query: How do they squeeze a full lamb's head into such a small box?  Were all these lambs born pre-mature and square-shaped? Also, though we are certainly not experts, we are guessing the contents of the box are not nearly so cute and content looking as the depiction on the cover.

In other fun Rosh Hashana apocalypse news: This web sites swears that the Rapture is scheduled for this Rosh Hashana! How awesome is that? Given that Rapture predictions are just as reliable as Moshiach-is-coming predictions I would not go ahead and make plans to get incinerated, next week, by the Lord's vengeance. Still, it makes for nice bein gavrah lgavrah conversation.

Search for more information about lamb heads at4torah.com  

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