Friday, July 08, 2005

They write letters...

... because they're too stupid to hold down jobs, I suppose.

Our faithful friend Avraham put on his waders, goggles, and rubber gloves and found this gem of gems in the current Yated:
I would like to bring to your readers’ attention the importance of a mizrach sign.

Consider the following scenarios:

• Women davening in shul may not be able to tell which way is mizrach.
• Guests staying at one’s home may be clueless about which direction is mizrach.
• A babysitter may not know in which direction to daven.
• Offices and conference rooms are often used for davening.
• Classrooms also need signs for a new teacher or after-school activities.

The mizrach sign guides the uninformed as to the proper direction to send prayers to Hashem in Yerushalayim. Facing west will take longer for our tefillos to reach Yerushalayim. Facing north or south misses the place completely (as any reader can verify by examining a globe).

You can buy a mizrach sign in a store, or make one yourself. If a person wants a more subtle sign, he can have a picture of the Kosel, or make an “East” sign. Of course, one should make sure to place the sign on the correct wall.

Really, Hashem hears our tefillos wherever we are, in whichever direction we face. However, with so many obstacles we face with our speech, for example lashon hara and ona’as devorim, why take the long way? At least we should ensure that our tefillos have the quickest route.
I mean, holy smokes.

It's not often you get apikorsus, avoda zara, misplaced piety and plain old stupidity all wrapped into one little letter.