Thursday, May 06, 2010

This just in: Earth round, kosher food normal

I do not understand why food reporters employed by the New York Times continue to express surprise whenever they encounter artfully prepared kosher food. You're in NYC, I feel like shouting. Why haven't you realized yet that kosher wine isn't syrupy sweet, and that there are cuts to enjoy other than brisket? Why does a reference to the hora almost always sneak into your reporting? When you write about India, are elephants always mentioned? Here's the latest:

Imagine kashrut — Jewish dietary law — as a kid in an elementary school. It would probably take on the role of hall monitor, enforcing restrictive rules that may or may not be important to the authorities: Sayonara, shrimp! Ciao, cheeseburgers! And for the love of G-d, stay away from pork!

Perhaps that is why kosher restaurants are not exactly homecoming queens at the culinary prom: they’re more about substance — and strict adherence to religious laws — than style.

Not so at Prime KO, a new Japanese steakhouse and sushi joint where kosher aspires to cool. At Tuesday’s opening night celebration, the dual-level restaurant, at West 85th Street and Broadway was a sea of crisp suits and towering stilettos, a rainbow of yarmulkes and a gathering for the most popular kids on the block.

Heads and shoulders above the sleek crowd was the athlete, Serge Ibaka, the 6-foot-10 center for the Oklahoma City Thunder.

The front-runner for class president? Michael S. Miller, chief executive of the Jewish Community Relations Council of New York, who greeted friends at every turn and offered a pithy remark: “The ingredients are here to ensure success beyond their expectations.”

The It Girl: Jamie-Lynn Sigler, a star of “The Sopranos,” former Hebrew school attendee and alumna of Taglit-Birthright Israel, an organization that sponsors trips to the Holy Land for young Jewish adults. “I was inspired on every level,” she said of her time there.

Below the dining room where Ms. Sigler held court with family and friends, sushi rolled out, though none with crab, shrimp or eel. Wine flowed like Jay-Z in “Empire State of Mind” and Lady Gaga’s “Just Dance,” which blasted through the speakers.

In a place where the glatt is the new hot, why couldn’t Gaga replace the hora?

Search for more information about tired reporting clichesat 4torah.com.

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