A letter from the cops

Dear Miriam:

We were very pleased to read your recent post on the merits of cooperating with the authorities. We especially liked your argument about how only a person with something to hide would, on principle, object to a search.

Therefore, we are requiring you to set a good example by submitting the following:

(1) A copy of every email you've sent in the last five years
(2) The names and telephone numbers of every person you've interviewed in a professional capacity
(3) Your most recent bank and credit card statement
(4) The key to your house
(5) The name and address of your doctor(s)
(6) A tongue swab
(7) A blood sample.

As you, of course, have nothing to hide, we're certain you won't object to this random search of your person, house, papers, and effects,

Sincerely,
YOUR FRIENDS
AT THE NYPD

Personally, I'd rather end up in a box, six feet under ground, than live where the cops can go through your possessions without probable cause. And if you had any sense of the stakes so would you.