I was horrified to spot a shocking display of blasphemous sacrilege on the food pages of today's New York Times. FRIED KREPLACH!
As anyone with a Torah-true education knows kreplach must be boiled. The suggestion that kreplach can be fried, like wontons or tortellinis, offends our sensibilties and makes a mockery of everything we, as Jews, hold holy.
You are hereby urged to write the editor fiery letters of condemnation, and to self-righteously announce your intention to boycott the Times forevermore (though its still ok to sneek a peek over someones shoulder.) But please don't fail to respond forcefully: Careless simple-seeming innovations like this are precisely how Hasidut got started. If we're going to protect the authenticity of our direct-to-Sinai mesorah uncompromising vigilance is needed.
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