Holy Letters

Dear Mr. Pope:

We Jews have a rule against doing any sort of creative labor on Saturday, but to my great chagrin, some evil people insist on violating and humiliating Jerusalem by driving cars and going to movies on this holy day. I'd really like to break some heads. Can you help?

~ Amar


Dear Mr. Chief Rabbi:

Here's what I would do. Tell them to do what you say or face the sword. That usually worked for us, but boy oh boy are you Jews stubborn. You may have to actually kill some of them, so gird your loins, etc, etc.
+
~Benny

PS - If you do start slaughtering, let me know. I have some free time next month, and I'd be glad to help out.

With thanks an apologies to halfnutcase