Quick! To the slimemobile!!

Crawford, Tx
August 10, 2005

Dear Mr. Rove:

We got us here a situation. This here America-hating mom is ruining my vacation. I can't even get out to clear no brush without seeing her and her mean old signs. Whenever I want to drive around in my truck, there she is, screaming and yellin'. I already told her I was sorry 'bout her son dyin' and all. What more does she want?

Can you do something, Karl? How about deploying Swift Boat Mothers for Truth on her pro-terrorist behind? Or maybe she's got herself a husband working for the CIA that you could unmask? Or maybe you could tell the newspapers that she' a homosexual? I don't know, but I'm going nuts here in the heat.

So I leave it to you, Karl. Like I always say, you're the best at making the bad stuff go away.

Love, your pal
George W. Bush