Wednesday, February 23, 2005

Heresy Sells

Has it occurred to you, heretics and bashers of the Torah Greats, that our dear, divinely-inspired Gedolim might have outsmarted us all?

I mean, consider this: Suppose you wanted to make sure that Nosson Slifkin's idea reached the widest possible audience. Which approach would you employ?

Would you (a) announce that his books are required reading, and essential to the spiritual development of mankind; or would you (b) announce a worldwide ban?

Those of you who rented an illegal projector and waited anxiously for your parents to take a vacation so that you and your friends could crowd together in the laundry room watching I Am Curiose Yellow, an authentically Banned in Boston motion picture, know exactly what I mean. And the parents of small children in the audience are nodding their heads and making mental notes ("Ban asparagus") for later.

Update: See what I mean: Pure genius!! Absent the ban, no way a Nosson Slifkin book commands $100 on eBay. Absent the ban, Nosson Slifikin's books are gathering dust in the back of Eichler's warehouse, next to the Jewishly-themed Baby-on-Board knock-offs.

In fact, having prayed on this matter for several seconds, I'm ready to proclaim via posters on the streets of Jerusalem, that Slifkin was in on the plan from the beginning.

He has six hours to respond, and no, I will not be showing up at the meeting.